My thoughts on today

Sometimes you hurt, sometimes you smile, sometimes you feel so lost and lonely and sometimes you cry. Sometimes you question what do I have to live for? Why can't I be happy just being me? Why can't I get over those stupid feelings? Because that would set me free..... Reflect on your life, what is stopping you from smiling, having fun and letting go? Are you still hurting from your past? Are you worried for the future? Can It actually be fixed? Is the worry realistic? If the answer is no... why do you still hold on to it? Is it just too hard to let go? Are you worried what is going to happen to you if you do? What is going to replace those thoughts? What's gonna replace that bit in your heart? Will it be empty, just a black hole? Am I holding onto these things because I'm scared of not thinking about it anymore, scared of having nothing to think about? Will that make me feel lonely? Although it is making me sad, the thought is it kind of comforting? Letting go hurts, and it's hard. They say hope is the last thing that leaves a person, I'm still hoping, I shouldn't, but I still am. Something awoke that had not been felt like that before... I realised I had really missed it... and then the feeling was still there but not what made me feel that way. It sucks how fast and easy you get used to something and how hurtful and hard it is to get rid of it. But that is life, we don't know till we try and If we don't try we will never know, and if we never know we will always wonder, and if we always wonder we can never let the though go..